Have you ever considered your genitals to be beautiful? Then again, can you look at your partner’s genitals and see beauty in much the same way as you might see beauty when you look in their eyes?
Were you taught that genitals were ‘dirty’? Were you told not to touch your genitals because it is ‘disgusting’?
By opening yourself to the beauty of genitals, you can integrate your whole body, mind and soul rather than segregating yourself into separate and divided entities called ‘sexual parts’ and ‘non-sexual parts’.
We all have body feelings originating from memories ‘stored’ in the genitals. These memories are actually stored in the subconscious mind, but are awakened when the genitals are aroused. Some of the memories are exciting and we can associate them with very stimulating experiences, others are romantic and connect us to memories of love and happiness. These body memories produce pleasant feelings when the genitals are aroused.
At the other extreme, many have experienced emotional hurt, pain of various kinds and even abuse or trauma associated with the genitals. Some people store us memories of separation, isolation or loneliness; in particular, feelings of failure, loss or powerlessness in their sex centre. Arousal of the genitals has the potential of arousing any, or all, of the above feelings. This is why men and women feel vulnerable and are often very defensive when their genitals are exposed.
Instead of hiding from your genitals, and the feelings associated with them, we invite you to become more familiar with them and thereby to lose any fear or over-defensiveness that you may have around your genitals.
Some people are comfortable with their sexual feelings; others less so for myriad reasons. For some the causes of the discomfort are obvious, while for others the causes of their discomfort have been either suppressed and hidden in the subconscious or repressed and buried in the unconscious. Emotional, mental and physical pain or trauma does not simply ‘go away’ when it is suppressed; the conflict remains and manifests as negative body feelings. Genitals often become the focus of the conflict.
Inner work and healing does not mean you become Superman or Wonder Woman overnight, nor does it mean that you become unrecognisable to your friends and family or to yourself. Becoming aware of what goes on within yourself simply means that you have the opportunity to build a more healthy relationship with your emotions, mind and body. It means that you have accepted those aspects of yourself. You will never fully know peace of mind if you constantly beat yourself up, put pressure on yourself to be different or wish you were someone other than yourself.
Most sexual fears and anxieties are based on judgements and assumptions that have no basis in reality. While growing through childhood or adolescence sexual fears or anxieties appear to be so real that the young boy or girl may close down on those feelings, believing that it would be too unbearable to endure them again.
In closing down on sexual feelings, however, they unwittingly close down the whole range of feelings that are needed in other areas of life. It then becomes as if feelings don’t exist at all. By re-visiting the feelings on which you may have ‘closed down’, you can learn to value and transform them into highly beneficial and fulfilling feelings that enrich life.
What’s more, your body will begin to be free to respond in positive ways. Energy will flow more freely through your body and you will experience the benefits in your whole body and mind.