You probably don’t need me to remind you how many intimate relationships break up, either in the first few years or even after twenty or thirty years of apparent “marital bliss”. Most people are aware, that what begins as a romantic dream all too often ends as a nightmare.
There isn’t enough time or space here to list all the reasons for intimate relationship breakdowns, and in any case, it would make you depressed to read them . . . and for me to write about them, I think I might give up the will to live!
Okay—if you insist—here we go: . . . recurring arguments, incompatibility, infidelity, sickness, financial pressure, mental health, the ageing process, children, the in-laws . . . and so on . . .
Focusing on the problems won’t solve them; that is the mistake that most couples, and traditional relationship counsellors and therapists make. They say: “Once we have resolved the issues, then perhaps we can find a solution for our relationship.” This is a catch-22.
There is a science to mastering intimate relationships. Most people enter into a relationship unscientifically, and when things start to go wrong, they have little or no clue how to put it right.
The No.1 reason—in every intimate relationship—for breakdown, breakup, separation or divorce is ultimately the decline, erosion and eventual disappearance of INTIMACY — and SEX.
I’ll pause here for a little while before continuing to write—simply to give some of you a bit of time to protest! Perhaps you feel that you want to smash the phone or computer screen on which you might be reading this blog!!
“Intimacy? . . . Sex? . . . The No.1 problem?! . . . How dare you suggest such a thing! If only we didn’t argue and fight so much, we might be able to be intimate again . . . if it wasn’t for (insert reason from the list in paragraph 3 above) then we might be able to consider having sex again! We can’t be intimate with all these problems that we have in our relationship!!”
The trouble with those protests, arguments and self-diagnosis is that they are based on a flawed premise. The arguments, pressures, apparent incompatibility—and possibly even infidelity—have developed because of the lack of intimacy, not the other way around.
There is one thing that is unique to intimate relationships, and that is intimacy. To rescue, restore and revive an intimate relationship, the central thing to restore is intimacy. I am not suggesting that trying to have sex is the answer; intimacy is the answer. Sex can be restored, when the foundation is restored.
Ultimately, everything within the Universe is connected. It is natural for human beings to feel connected. It is the deepest longing of the soul.
The Universe has arisen from a “cosmic orgasm” – the “Big Bang.” At the back of everything that exists, there lies a field of perfect peace and harmony; it is known as equilibrium. This field of energetic perfection is the connection between what we know as “masculine” and “feminine” energies, and within it exists every possible manifestation of life. Every atom, proton, cell, hormone and—yes, every idea—arises out of this ocean of perfectly balanced energy. We have been born into life form out of this ocean of perfection.
The Universe works on a meticulous system that ultimately governs and determines nature: the seasons, the tides, gravity . . . and even intimate relationships. If you know the system, you can master your life.
There are seven Master-Keys, twelve Universal Laws and seven Essential Practices which, once known and practiced by anybody—irrespective of culture or conditioning—will result in an indestructible intimate relationship. You don’t have to believe that statement; by discovering the Master-Keys and through your own direct experience, you will prove it for yourself.